Feb 28, 2009 - John 13:18-30

I tell you the truth, whoever accepts anyone I send accepts me; and whoever accepts me accepts the one who sent me"..

I had re-read this verse a couple of times because I was just like hmm.. "anyone I send" I was trying to think who Jesus sends.. maybe it's those non-believers that Jesus sends or just friends that are struggling with their personal lives.. but many times I don't accept them with open hearts. I have a bad habit of judging people by their looks or actions without knowing them in person and I think this is something I have to really work on for those that I just can't get along might be those the Christ sent on purpose. 

Finally Jesus predicts his death by giving  a piece of bread to Judas Iscariot.. I wonder what Jesus felt like prediciting this and even 11 other disciples. Jesus was betrayed by his own disciples.. not by some random person on the street. it must have been heartbreaking to see his own loving disciple to betray him for some money.. 

Feb 27, 2009 - John 13: 1-17

Back in those days.. since people didn't have shoes or sandles or whatever, they were in barefeet a lot.. so basically people's feet were the diriest part of their body. And from the scriptures, we can see that Jesus washed the disciples' feet. I remember doing it for my small group back when I volunteered for this retreat in Korea. It was so show my kids.. how much Christ loves them and that I love them.. it was something I can never forget. Some kids were crying.. some were just goofing off but it was a memorable time for all who attend the retreat. 

"I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.." 

This is what I want to be able to do.. not just washing people's feet but for other things Christ did during his journey.

Feb 26, 2009 - John 12:37-50

In today's passage, I can see that some jews including the Pharisees are still doubting Jesus even after the miracles that He performed. I can tell that Christ cries out in distress that there is a judge for the one who rejects me and does not accept my words; that very word which I spoke will condemn him at the last day. He also said that whatever He says is just what the Father has told Him to say. 

In a fallen world like these days, I feel like it is getting harder to stay strong in Christ. There are so many distractions, temptations, etc. I feel like our world is just like the verse 42 and 43 of how some love praise from men more than praise from God and they claim themselves servants of God! I've experienced this myself before.. i realize that i was serving not to glorify God but for my 'pride and selfish desires'.. we are such sinful human beings.. that's why all we need is God.. nothing else! 

Feb 25, 2009 - John 12:20-36

Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and die, it remains only a single seed.. but if it dies, it produces MANY seeds..When I read this, it just hit me hard.. about how Christ died on the cross for all of us here on earth.. And because of Him, I'm able to know about Christ and go to heaven. If He didn't sacrifice himself for us.. then.. we all would have ended up in hell. This is something I knew since I was young but.. the parable He used just was kinda like wow..
"whoever serves me must follow me and where I am, my servant also will be. My father will honor the one who serves me." God honors those that serves Christ.. this is why I need to serve Him.. to glorify His name.. and "Put your trust in the light while you have it, so that you may become songs of light.." AMEN!

Feb 24, 2009 - John 11:45 - 12:19

After Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, I can see that the Pharisees were furious and now planning to kill Jesus. I wonder how Jesus felt at that time.. as He knew that He will soon be betrayed by not some other person but one of His disciples.. and to that cross. This just shows how humble and awesome our Lord is.. He bares all the pain for our sins even though we did not deserve to receive any of these and belong in hell.
Martha broke her expensive perfume on Jesus's feet and wiped his feet with her hair... and as we all know.. it was years' worth wages! These it's been hard for me.. trying to find a job and getting stressed out because of money and etc. But really.. God will provide and like Martha I shouldn't be all uptight about the money but just give it all to God..

Feb 23 ,2009 - John 11:1-43

I knew about the story of Lazarus since I was young and I didn't know Jesus went to Judea where he was about to be stoned by Jews earlier in His journey. And it also says in verse 35 that Jesus wept which I can tell that Jesus really loved Lazarus and his sisters, Mary and Martha. And as we all know Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead! I admire Martha's strong trust in Jesus. She keeps saying that if you (Jesus) was here earlier, Lazarus would not have been dead. Because I were in her position, I probably would have been blaming Jesus for not being here on time or what not and obviously would have expected Jesus to raise Lazarus from the dead. I think that's one thing I really have to learn from Martha. Being able to trust God even if things don't workout the way I want things to.

Feb 22, 2009 - John 10:22-42

As pastor Kim said during the sermon today.. the world hates Christians.. God is trying to bring light into this world but we, humans, are too comfortable in the darkness..
While I was reading today's scripture.. I kept getting angry at those that mocked and tried to stone Christ. I thought to myself... the many things I say and do.. aren't really christian-like things. I have such a hard time laying everything down to God for He will provide and He will have a plan for me... but worries triumph over me.. it has been my prayer request to be able to trust without doubts and concerns and to do my best in all that I do to glorify His name.. It is definitely hard and I feel guilty of failing at it but I pray that God gives me strength, wisdom, and patience to continue..

Feb 21, 2009 - John 10:1-21

The shepherd and the sheep.. it is soo true that the sheep will be frightened and will run away when a stranger tries lead the sheep however when the shepherd does.. they follow him and will eat grass peacefully. And we are His sheep and He is our shepherd. As Jesus says "I tell you the truth, I am the gate for the sheep. all who ever came before me were thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not listen to them. I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved."
Reading today's passage reminded me of David when he used to be sheperd. Sheep can't really fight for its life so without a shepherd leading it and saving them from wolves and stuff, they are helpless. And we are the sheep, and without Christ, we are weak... but we are strong for He is my good shepherd..

Feb 20, 2009 - John 9

Jesus performed a miracle on a blind man by spitting on the ground to make some mud and placing it on the blind man! If I were there watching Jesus perform this.. I would have been.. woah.. what is that guy doing?!? because... first he is spitting on the ground and also in the verses it says he mixed some saliva with the mud from the ground.. that just sounds dirty lol
However, the blind man followed Jesus's directions and was able to see after several years of bagging on the streets. But of course.. the pharisees couldn't just let that go! They make a fuss about how Jesus performed a miracle on a Sabbath day.. and it's just ridiculous reading about how pharisees bring the blind man's parents to make sure that he was blind before! It sounds very childish that they are trying so hard to not-believe Christ is God's son.. BUT HE IS!

Feb 19, 2009 - John 8:42-59

If anyone keeps my word, he will never see death....
It's kinda funny when the Jews react to Jesus when they heard this. They claim that Jesus is demon-possessed and their father Abraham died therefore.. Jesus is crazy? It's just such a stupid answer! The truth is that Jesus was there even before creation.. But it's sad just to hear their words and actions.. especially when they were going to stone Jesus..
I can't stop thinking about if I would have been one of the Jews. It's sad to say but.. I might have been.. probably blinded by my sins.. I think this is why it's important to have small groups, large groups, discipleship, accountability partners.. etc.. just to have others keep accountable for each other.. making sure we all run the race together.

Feb 18, 2009 - John 8:31-41

Today's scripture made me realize how blind I am. The Jews didn't understand what Jesus said but they were blinded in their sins. What it made me realize is that, when I am in my comfort zone, I get loose with my quiet times, I don't pray as much, and etc. Even though it should be like this, I continue to find myself doing that. It's like me buried under my own sins.
I want to be able to living according to Jesus's teachings for He said "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."
Honestly.. there are so many things that Jesus teaches us but when I go to heaven, I wanna be able to say without shame that I did my best..

Feb 17, 2009 - John 8:12-30

Verse 12: "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness but will have the light of life"
Verse 15 and 16: You judge by human standards; I pass judgment on no one. But if I do judge, my decisions are right, because I am not alone. I stand with the Father, Who sent me.
Verse 19: "If you knew me, you would know my Father also."
Verse 23: "You are of this world; I am not of this world."
---

Jesus talks to the people in firm belief and many people put their faith in him by what He spoke about like the verses above. I can just feel Jesus charisma by just reading these verses. Also I realize John continues to say that no one seized him, because his time had not yet come.. which I know that John is leading the reader to the cross later in the chapters. I admire Jesus for being able to overcome all the ridicules that Pharisees and many others gave him for speaking the truth. I know I will never be like Jesus but I want to be able to stay strong in Jesus Christ even if the biggest and the scariest storms come!

Feb 16, 2009 - John 7:45 - 8:11

As I continue to read John.. I am daily aware of how sinful I am. In today's readings, the woman caught in adultery was the main theme. The Pharisees wanted the woman to be stoned and they falsely used the laws that Moses received from God said that the rightful punishment is to be stoned. I think our life is like this at times. I make up excuses so that it doesn't make me feel bad as much or ashamed for what I did as much. I also like how Jesus forgives the woman and gives her a second chance. God is a God of second chances.. He always forgives us when we repent.. He is a gracious and merciful God.. AMEN!

Feb 15, 2009 - John 7: 24-43

"If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."

I believe in Jesus Christ and I hope that Streams of living water flow from within me.. but i fail many times and sin a lot. The things I say or do sometimes makes me thing wow.. I need to glorify God but in stead I am ruining God's name! I ask for repentance and I pray that.. God convicts me for I might fall again.. or more like I will fall..

Feb. 14, 2009 - John 7:14-24

When I read these verses.. one thing struck me hard. It was verse 18.: "He who speaks on his own does so to gain honor for himself, but he who works for the honor of the one who sent him is a man of truth" Even though I always pray to God to take all of me and that I will be a living sacrifice but I still have things I hold on to. And I've been trying to find the best major for me and for my future and.. it was mostly for my own good and my selfish needs. So, like the verse said to gain honor for myself.. But I want to me the woman of truth! And yes.. I need to work for God's honor and glory. In stead of my just saying in words.. I will do it out of my heart.. and out of joy.. for deserves all of me and much more!

Feb. 13, 2009 - Hosanna

Hosanna
I see the king of glory
Coming on the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes
The whole earth shakes

I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing
The people sing

Hosanna
Hosanna
Hosanna in the highest

I see a generation
Rising up to take their place
With selfless faith
With selfless faith

I see a near revival
Stirring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees
We're on our knees

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me

Break my heart from what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdoms cause
As I go from nothing to
Eternity

Hosanna in the highest

Hosanna in the highest.. what does that really mean? It's the cry of our heart for salvation and praising God with all our heart, our mind!! The lyrics are sooooo good in that.. It is my prayer.. I extra love the bridge part. I want God to make my hear pure and clean.. wanna be able to love ilke he loved me and others.. I want him to break my heart.. and I want to do everything for His kingdom! For I am unworthy and nothing.. but because of His grace and through faith I have been saved. THANK YOU LORD... =]]

Feb. 12, 2009 - John 7: 1-13

I wonder what it would Jesus would have felt. He stayed away from Judea because the Jews there were waiting to kill him. So, he went around in Galilee. I bet if I were in his positions, I would have regretted doing this and would have blamed God for all this. But, obviously Jesus didn't think this way. I love when he say that " The right time for me has not yet come; for you any times is right." I've been praying about God's timing. This might be slightly off track, but I get very impatient with things. Whether it's about choosing my future career or just waiting in line. I think it's important for us to think about His timing. As of right now it might seem like this or that is the right thing but in the long run God might have a different plan for us. And.. I really know what my purpose here on earth.. I believe God would reveal it to me in His timing but it's so hard.. but I will continue to pray about it and be patient..

Feb 11, 2009 - John 6

I love how when the group of people went to go see Jesus, Jesus says that you are looking for me because I fed the five thousand but you should actually be looking for the food of eternal life. I think it's so easy for us to get caught up with the things that are happening around us but in reality we should look at the core whether when we are struggling or happy or whatever. Finally toward the end Jesus says "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. 36But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. 37All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day." Once again this just encourages me to go on for I have this wonderful eternal life and this is open to all who come to Him.

Feb 10, 2009 - John 5

After Jesus healed the man by the pool, he said stop sinning or something worse may happen to you.. This is such a powerful verse. I was shocked of just reading it. I am such a sinful person and.. I sin so many times a day without even knowing I am..
At the next set of verses Jesus says 24"I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life. 25I tell you the truth, a time is coming and has now come when the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God and those who hear will live. 26For as the Father has life in himself, so he has granted the Son to have life in himself. 27And he has given him authority to judge because he is the Son of Man.. These verses just make me feel so thankful of Christ. a sinful being like me can have this amazing eternal life and won't be condemned because of Christ. THANK YOU LORD..!

Feb 9, 2009 - John 4:27-54

It was heartwarming to hear Jesus say that His food is to do the will of him who sent me and to finish his work. I think it's true for us too. Our food is not the earthly food we eat for hunger but to do things such as sharing the gospel or serving at a local church or just even praying for one another is the food we need to eat. But, nowadays it's so easy to look for food in other things that God doesn't want us to do.
Finally Jesus does his second miracle by healing this son of the official. The official came to ask Jesus to heal his son and all Jesus said was you may go, your son will live! And the official didn't say are you serious? what? that's impossible! instead he just simply believed and trusted Jesus's words and went home. I think I need to learn this type of trust. These days I'm so used to questioning everything and have a hard time trusting people and I doubt God even at times. I pray that I will learn to obey God's commends whatever the situation may be.

Feb 8, 2009 - John 4: 1-26

Jesus was in Samaria when he met this Samaritan woman. He asks for a drink to her and she tells him about how he is a Jew and he shouldn't ask her for a drink. I feel like I might have had the same reaction. I have a hard time going 'against the flow'. Our last SG bible study was about how we need to be the salt and light of the world. And this is what I need to work on; being able to live counter-culturally for this world is so fallen. Jesus later discusses her about this living water and in verse 13 he says "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." This is one of my favorite verses and It's such an awesome verse. How we will have eternal life through Jesus Christ! Lastly, when the Samaritan woman says that I know the Messiah is coming.. and Jesus answers her that I who speak to you am he! I think if I were her, I would first be so surprised but would be in such joy and probably would share with everyone around me of how the Messiah is here! I can't wait till when Christ returns and when He does.. I pray that I won't be ashamed of all the sins I've commited but be proud to have been a faith servant of God.

Feb 7, 2009 - Reign In Us

Reign In Us
You thought of us before the world began to breathe
You knew our names before we came to be
You saw the very day we fall away from you
And how desperately we need to be redeemed

Lord jesus
Come lead us
We're desperate for your touch

Oh great and mighty one
With one desire we come
That you would reign that you would reign in us
We're offering up our lives
A living sacrifice
That you would reign that you would reign in us

Spirit of the living God fall fresh again
Come search our hearts and puify our lives
We need your perfect love we need your discipline
We're lost unless you guide us with your light

Lord jesus
Come lead us
We're desperate for your touch

Oh great and mighty one
With one desire we come
That you would reign that you would reign in us
We're offering up our lives
A living sacrifice
That you would reign that you would reign in us

We cry out for your life to revive us cry out
For your love to define us cry out
For your mercy to keep us
Blameless until you return

Oh great and mighty one
With one desire we come
That you would reign that you would reign in us
We're offering up our lives
A living sacrifice
That you would reign that you would reign in us

So reign please reign in us
Come purify our hearts
We need your touch
Come cleanse us like a flood
And set us out
So the world may know you reign you reign in us

I first learned about this song at J-Gen over the summer. I wanted to look deeper what it meant to have God reign in us. So I looked the definition reign and webster said that it is royal authority and the dominion, sway, or influence of one resembling a monarch. I struggle with this a lot. Having God as my top priority. Because when I'm busy or tired, I put my quiet times aside and either sleep or hang out with others instead of spending more time with Him. I love the first verse of how God new our names before we were born and of how He thought of us before even the world was created. It just shows how we all have a purpose here on this earth.

Feb 6, 2009 - One Desire

One Desire
You gave it all for me
My soul desire, my everything
And all I am is devoted to You

How could I fail to see
You are the love that rescued me
And all I am is devoted to You

And oh, how could I not be moved
Lord here with You
So have Your way in me
Cause Lord, there is just one thing
That I will seek

This is my cry
My one desire
Is to be where You are, Lord
Now and forever
Its more than a song
My one desire
Is to be with You
Is to be with You, Jesus

This song really touched my heart today during LG. It is so true that my one and only desire is to be with Jesus. And I also want Him to have it His way.. even though there will be times were I won't understand why God puts me through these trials. I can never say enough how thankful I am to have Lord as my savior.

Feb 5, 2009 - John 3

Being born again in Christ by water and the Spirit..
I had to think a lot about what it meant to be born again.
I know that once you admit that Christ is our Lord and Savior, believe that Christ died for our sins, and confess that we are sinners, we are essential born again in Christ for there's a versus about how the old has gone and the new has come!
However I think it more important to be born again daily through prayer and scripture reading. In a fallen world like ours, I think it's so easy to fall or slip away from God. I do admit that doing quiet times every day is hard for me at times but it does keep focused on God and also help me to continue the journey even thought there are temptations here and there.

Feb 4, 2009 - John 2

The story of turning water into wine is such a famous miracle that everyone knows. I was reading the bible and was just like.. so the same old.. But one thing caught my attention when Jesus's mother told him about how there's no more wine, Jesus said that Dear woman, why do you involve me?" My time has not yet come." I kinda thought about what he meant by that. Because he performed the miracle anyways.. but it seemed like it wasn't the right time for him to start his ministry or something. I still don't get why he said that..
Next story was about what Jesus did at the temple. Jesus said that He will destroy this temple and he will raise it again in three days! At first I thought that those three days didn't really symbolize anything but now I think He said that to portray Himself dying on the Cross and rising from the dead in three days.
I need to trust more in God and be patient for things will be done His timing not mine. Just like how the servants at the banquet just simply followed the direction by drawing up water without knowing that it'll be wine, I want to be able to just simply follow whatever God tells me to do.

Feb. 2, 2009 - John 1

The famous verse "In beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." is so commonly said these days. However, it does portray that God is THE WORD and there are no other gods but Him. I had read the first chapter over and over again because I couldn't concentrate! But while I tried to read over and over again I wondered if Jesus came up to me and said "come follow me", what my reactions would have been. Honestly, I feel like I might have hesitated like Nathanael which is a sad thing to say. However, I love when Nathanael was surprised of Christ knowing his existence, and Jesus said "You shall see greater things than that. I tell you the truth, you shall see heaven open, and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man" .. it is such a powerful verse.. it makes me wanna know Christ more and more daily till the day I see heaven and ultimately God.